Is Your Daughter Being Pushed Out Of Her Friend Group

Sometimes it takes a quiet moment to realize just how much a friendship has changed.
If your daughter has been struggling with a shift in her friend group, that pause in the daily routine might bring those feelings to the surface. It’s almost as if the bridge she built to include someone new was suddenly burned—and now she’s left on the other side, unsure how to cross back and feeling like no one is reaching out to help.

This kind of friendship shift can be especially hard to process when she still sees those same friends at school every day. Each class or group activity becomes a reminder of what used to be—and of the rejection she now feels.

As a parent, witnessing this pain can be heartbreaking. But even when you don’t have all the answers, your support makes a powerful difference.

Let’s take a moment to ask a few thoughtful questions—and explore how they can guide your daughter through this tough emotional space with empathy and strength.

A friend group:

• Welcomes individuality and growth.

• Encourages mutual respect and empathy.

• Makes room for multiple connections and shifting dynamics.

• Is flexible—there’s room to include others and resolve conflict.

A clique:

• Has unspoken rules about who is “in” and who is “out.”

• Often revolves around one or two dominant personalities.

• Uses exclusion, silence, or gossip to control others.

• Can make your daughter feel anxious about saying or doing the wrong thing.

• Does she feel safe, supported, and accepted for who she is?

• Or does she constantly feel unsure of where she stands?

• After spending time with this group of friends does your daughter feel energized or is she emotionally drained and in tears?

• Is she constantly monitoring her behavior or filtering what she says?

• Is she afraid of conflict and bending herself to stay accepted?

• Does she feel like she can’t be her full self around them anymore?

   

 
Sometimes the fear of being alone is stronger than the discomfort of staying. It can be hard to move on when it feels like everyone else is staying in the group—or when memories of better times still linger. But staying in a group that causes harm isn’t the answer to loneliness.

 Validate Her Hurt.
Let her talk it out without rushing to fix it. This is hard—and she’s not alone in feeling this way.

 Use the Space of Spring Break.
Time away from the group can offer a helpful emotional reset. Encourage her to spend time doing things that bring her joy—art, sports, books, new friends, or family time.

 Reflect on What She Wants in a Friend.
What does a real friend look and feel like to her? What qualities make her feel safe, seen, and supported?

 Shift the Focus from Pleasing to Choosing.
Remind her that she doesn’t have to twist herself into someone else’s version of “enough.” She can choose friendships that feel mutual and respectful.

  Help Her Rebuild.
If she's ready, brainstorm how she might branch out—maybe inviting a new girl to hang out, joining a new club, or even just doing the Smile & Hi Challenge to open new connections.

It hurts to see our daughters navigate these painful moments, but these experiences can also be powerful opportunities to build resilience, self-awareness, and clarity about the kind of friendships they deserve. If your daughter is struggling, remind her: this moment does not define her. She is learning, growing, and finding her people—and you’re right beside her every step of the way.

If your daughter is preparing for middle school, my Survive and Thrive in Middle School course is a wonderful way for both of you to build confidence and prepare for the road ahead. For girls navigating tricky friendship dynamics, my Beyond the Drama course offers tools to help parents in understanding and managing their daughters social challenges with more clarity and confidence.

And if your daughter would benefit from ongoing support, we’d love to have her as a guest in one of my groups—The Brave Girl Tribe (for girls in 5th–8th grade) or the High School Girls Support Group. Both groups meet on Sundays and offer a warm, welcoming space to connect, grow, and feel less alone. We would love for your daughter to join us today!

You're not alone—and neither is she.

 Warmly,

Laura Hayes
Founder of The Brave Girl Project
Life Coach for Tween & Teen Girls
www.TheBraveGirlProject.com
[email protected]