The Brave Girl Blog Navigating Friendship Challenges and Confidence

As our kids return to school, the excitement of reuniting with friends often comes mixed with anxieties about past conflicts and evolving social dynamics. It's normal for daughters to worry about questions like:

• "Is my friend still mad about that huge mix-up we had last year? I hope it’s not weird between us now."
• "Did my friends hang out a lot without me this summer? What if they’re not that into me anymore?"
• "What if I don’t have any classes or even lunch with my friends? That would totally suck."
• "Are my friends still caught up in all that drama from last year? I really don’t want to deal with more of them hating on each other."

These concerns can transform into nighttime worries, making it difficult for girls to sleep and start the school year with confidence.

To help manage these fears, it's crucial we teach our daughters how to control negative thoughts. Understanding the 9 Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) and how to counteract them with...

As the new school year approaches, it's a great time to reflect on the valuable lessons and skills that can help our girls thrive in middle and high school. Transitioning to middle school can be a challenging time, filled with new experiences and expectations.
 Here are the three key takeaways that rising middle school girls need to know before starting middle school:

1. Friendships Evolve: Not everyone will remain a close friend, and that's okay. It's natural for friendships to change as you grow.
2. Self-Advocacy: Learn to speak up for yourself. Whether it's in class or with friends, expressing your needs and boundaries is crucial.
3. Organization is Key: Keeping track of assignments, due dates, and extracurricular activities can prevent overwhelm. Use planners or digital apps to stay organized.

Help Your Daughter with Back-to-School Worries: Is your child’s anxiety about the new school year starting to feel overwhelming? We understand the challenges these moments can...

I loved watching the Olympics and often find myself on the edge of my seat as if these athletes are my own family members. The dedication and sacrifices these women and men make are nothing short of inspiring.
Who is inspiring you?

I have been inspired by Ilona Maher, a member of the US Women's Rugby Team that won the bronze medal. I love her positive messages, from fueling our bodies to appreciating what our bodies allow us to do, to inspiring others to "find a place where you feel comfortable, fit, and are able to express yourself."

In one tearful video, Ilona shared that it hurts when people call her masculine or suggest that she takes steroids. She went on to share:

"They think women should be fragile and petite and quiet and meek, but that’s not the case. Women can be strong, and they can have broad shoulders, and they can take up space, and they can be big. I think I’m getting emotional because I feel very passionate about this. There will always be negative people...

As I approached the start of 8th grade, my family moved to a new town several states away from where I had grown up. That summer, I was buzzing with dreams of becoming popular at my new middle school. Many girls envision returning to school and suddenly finding themselves part of the popular group. However, we often discover that reality doesn't live up to the lofty hopes and dreams we nurture over the summer.

This past weekend in The Brave Girl Tribe, the girls shared their own stories about friends who have left them behind for the more popular group. It’s a common experience, but that doesn’t make it any less challenging.

Understanding the different types of popularity and how perceptions change from the tween to teen years can help us better support our daughters. Let's explore these concepts and practical strategies to guide our girls in navigating their social worlds.

Types of Popularity

Research focuses on two different types of popularity: Status-Based Popularity...

Empowering Your Daughter to Overcome Bullying

In The Brave Girl Tribe, many girls have courageously shared their experiences of being bullied by classmates and even friends. Hearing these stories has been incredibly helpful for others, showing them they are not alone and providing encouragement and support from their peers.

We understand the growing anxiety our girls may feel, especially during transitions such as moving into middle school or starting a new school. It's natural for them to worry about facing such challenges again.

Our goal is to equip you with strategies to help your daughter cope with past bullying experiences and empower her to rise above them and thrive.

Why is it so easy for our daughters to believe their bullies? Understanding this can help us better support our girls in building resilience against bullying.

8 Psychological Insights Into Why Girls Believe Their Bullies

1. Negativity Bias: Our brains are wired to pay more attention to negative information. This...

Today, I am thrilled to share something very close to my heart—the launch of our Survive and Thrive in Middle School Course  for both parents and daughters. But before I dive into the details, I'd like to take a moment to tell you a story about how this course came to life.

Last July, I set out to transform the guidance and strategies I’ve shared with middle school girls in my groups into something bigger—a comprehensive course. What started as a simple idea quickly turned into a passionate labor of love. But I'll be honest, this journey hasn't been without its challenges. It also became a personal battle with my own perfectionism and imposter syndrome. Every step of creating this course forced me to confront these challenges, pushing me to grow alongside the very lessons I aimed to teach.

Today, I am excited to introduce Survive and Thrive in Middle School Course designed to empower you and your daughter during a pivotal phase of her life. This course isn't...

As summer beckons with its promise of endless possibilities, it's the perfect time to dream big and plan even bigger! This year, we're taking the summer bucket list to a new level of excitement and personal growth.

Why Create a Summer Growth Bucket List?
Summer isn't just a break from school—it's a vibrant season to explore new interests, master skills, and push the boundaries of what you think is possible. Whether your daughter wants to dive into a new book series, learn a digital skill, or start a mini-business, there's no limit to what she can achieve with a bit of imagination and a lot of inspiration.

I've created a Summer Bucket List PDF featuring six unique worksheets designed to help you and your daughter craft a summer filled with cherished memories. Drawing on my experience as a school counselor, I often faced what I call 'summer regret' when returning to school, realizing I hadn't accomplished everything I'd hoped during the break—a sentiment echoed by my...

This past week has been filled with enriching experiences aimed at fostering a supportive environment for our children and students. I had the privilege of participating in various workshops and presentations emphasizing the importance of nurturing positive relationships and addressing anxiety in our young ones.

I had the honor of attending the SPACE Workshop led by Dr. Eli Lebowitz. This course provided invaluable insights into supporting parents in guiding their anxious children. It reinforced the significance of communication and instilling confidence in our children to navigate life's challenges. I am excited to apply the lessons I learned to the parents and girls that I support.

Next, I was honored to conduct Staff Development Training at Fairview Elementary via Zoom for all their amazing teachers and staff. My presentation focused on "Supporting Positive Friendships in the Classroom." It was heartening to see educators coming together to address the nuances of relational...

As I celebrate another year of life, I find myself reflecting on the past, particularly a poignant memory from my 13th birthday. Turning 13 marked a significant milestone, and I couldn't wait to celebrate with my friends.

On that anticipated day, only one friend was able to attend my sleepover party. The rest were away on a ski trip, leaving me with a mix of embarrassment and hurt. I couldn't help but wonder why I hadn't been a part of that ski trip with them. The disappointment ran deep, and it's a feeling many of us have experienced in our lives.

Friendship disappointments can cut deep, and that experience was no exception. What I've learned as an adult is that we often personalize these situations, making them about ourselves when, in reality, they may not be.

I share this personal story not only as a reflection on my past but to acknowledge the universal struggles that girls face in...

Many parents ask me for advice on supporting their daughters through the emotional turmoil of friendship troubles.

One common question arises: "Should I contact the girl's parents who are being mean to my daughter?"

I understand how confusing and upsetting it is when our daughter's experience hurt, and as a parent, you are actively seeking ways to support her. It's natural to wonder if reaching out to the parents of the girl causing distress would be beneficial.

With three decades of experience working with children and parents, I've found that reaching out to the other parent often doesn't yield the desired results you, as a parent, are hoping for.
Talking to the parents of the child who is causing issues can be complex and delicate.

Plus, there are different factors to consider before contacting the other parent.

The foremost consideration is whether your daughter desires your assistance and believes contacting the other parents would be constructive.

It's crucial to avoid a...