The Brave Girl Blog Navigating Friendship Challenges and Confidence

December is a month full of excitement, anticipation, and, for many high school seniors, ANXIETY.

For students who applied to colleges for early action or early decision, December 15th is a pivotal date when many colleges send out their admissions decisions. This year, as I walk through this process with my son—also a senior—I’m acutely aware of how these moments can shape not only the future but also the present emotional well-being of our children.

For many students, the college application process is an all-consuming journey: A carefully curated portfolio of advanced classes, extracurricular activities, volunteer work, and countless hours of preparation. So, when the time comes to open that letter or email from their dream school, it feels like everything hinges on the outcome. The stakes feel high, and for many girls, this process is even more emotionally charged.

But what happens if the letter says "NO"?

The sting of a college rejection can feel...

Has your daughter experienced a friend who seems to be quietly trying to turn others against her?

Perhaps this friend shares negative stories about your daughter when she isn’t around or makes subtle, backhanded comments in front of their friends.

Maybe your daughter has tried to talk to this friend to understand why she’s acting this way, only to be met with denial or no clear explanation.

This kind of behavior often comes from insecurity; the friend may be afraid others will like your daughter more and, in trying to avoid feeling left out, resort to behaviors that undermine your daughter.

If your daughter is dealing with a friend like this, it can be painful and confusing to navigate. Here are some ways you can support her through this challenging experience—helping her stay confident, set healthy boundaries, and strengthen her positive friendships.

The first step in supporting your daughter is helping her to become aware of the signs of insecure, sabotaging...

Is your daughter struggling with a mean or disrespectful friend in her group?

Many girls I work with in coaching share this same challenge. It's heartbreaking to see how deeply it affects them, especially within their friendships.

Together, we explore why some people behave this way and, most importantly, how your daughter can respond with confidence and strength. By learning these skills, she can take back control of the situation and feel more empowered in her relationships.

When someone is mean or intentionally condescending, their goal is often to get an emotional reaction. They feel powerful when they provoke a response from others, and that reaction gives them the control they want.

Encouraging your daughter to recognize this can be a game-changer. Instead of reacting emotionally—whether by defending herself or becoming apologetic— Use these 6 steps

1. Pause Before Reacting: The first thing your daughter can do when someone is mean or condescending. By...

Has your daughter ever come home in tears because of a friend who is acting mean, especially through passive-aggressive actions directed toward her?

This is a common theme that members of The Brave Girl Tribe frequently discuss during our calls, and it's also a challenge faced by many of my individual coaching clients.

Understanding and dealing with mean behavior can be perplexing and distressing for both parents and daughters. In this blog we'll dive into what passive-aggressive behavior really is, recognize the signs, and explore strategies to support your daughter through these challenging interactions.

This behavior might manifest as comments that seem polite on the surface but carry a hurtful undertone, or actions that appear cooperative but actually disrupt or delay outcomes. For example, it might look like giving a compliment that also sounds like a criticism, or agreeing to help with a school project but then procrastinating so much that it becomes unhelpful.

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As our daughters embark on their middle school journey, they navigate a complex maze of social, emotional, and academic transformations. Understanding these pivotal changes is crucial in providing them with the support they need.

To further aid you and your daughter during this transition, I offer a course titled 'Survive & Thrive in Middle School.' This course is designed to empower both parents and daughters by addressing the key challenges that middle school brings. It includes modules on how to manage changing friendships, increase self-esteem, handle academic pressures, and navigate the often turbulent social waters of middle school life.

Additionally, the course provides parents with essential guidance on managing their own uncertainties and stresses about middle school, offering strategies to support their daughters effectively. With a mix of video lessons, downloadable PDFs, and interactive activities, the course provides practical strategies and tools to help your...

As the new school year begins, many of our daughters are facing back-to-school challenges, which can bring up feelings of exclusion, loneliness, and uncertainty. I've heard several girls share common experiences during this time:

• "My friends are talking about things that I am not a part of since I'm not in classes with them, and I feel really left out."
• "There are kids who made fun of me in elementary school that are now in my lunch block, and I feel like they are staring and talking about me."
• "I have no one to sit with at lunch—or at least no one I really want to sit with."
• "I asked a girl to partner with me, and every time she says no, and that she she wants to work alone. But when another group asks her, she'll join them. I really don't know what to do now."

These are tough situations, and as parents, it's natural to want to fix them. But sometimes, the most powerful thing we can do is simply listen. Our daughters need to feel heard and validated. Acknowledge their...

I loved watching the Olympics and often find myself on the edge of my seat as if these athletes are my own family members. The dedication and sacrifices these women and men make are nothing short of inspiring.
Who is inspiring you?

I have been inspired by Ilona Maher, a member of the US Women's Rugby Team that won the bronze medal. I love her positive messages, from fueling our bodies to appreciating what our bodies allow us to do, to inspiring others to "find a place where you feel comfortable, fit, and are able to express yourself."

In one tearful video, Ilona shared that it hurts when people call her masculine or suggest that she takes steroids. She went on to share:

"They think women should be fragile and petite and quiet and meek, but that’s not the case. Women can be strong, and they can have broad shoulders, and they can take up space, and they can be big. I think I’m getting emotional because I feel very passionate about this. There will always be negative people...

Empowering Your Daughter to Overcome Bullying

In The Brave Girl Tribe, many girls have courageously shared their experiences of being bullied by classmates and even friends. Hearing these stories has been incredibly helpful for others, showing them they are not alone and providing encouragement and support from their peers.

We understand the growing anxiety our girls may feel, especially during transitions such as moving into middle school or starting a new school. It's natural for them to worry about facing such challenges again.

Our goal is to equip you with strategies to help your daughter cope with past bullying experiences and empower her to rise above them and thrive.

Why is it so easy for our daughters to believe their bullies? Understanding this can help us better support our girls in building resilience against bullying.

8 Psychological Insights Into Why Girls Believe Their Bullies

1. Negativity Bias: Our brains are wired to pay more attention to negative information. This...

Making friends in middle school can be effortless for some girls, while others may find it challenging to initiate and maintain friendships.

In my online community for girls in 5th to 8th grade, The Brave Girl Tribe, many members have expressed a desire for help in making new friends. We are dedicated to supporting them! During our meetings, we discuss strategies for making and maintaining friendships. The girls share their challenges and encourage each other with positive ideas and support

My new course, "Survive and Thrive in Middle School," includes a comprehensive section on navigating various social situations, which is often one of the biggest stressors for girls. Don't miss out on this opportunity to help your daughter thrive in her social life. Click here for a coupon

Here are some tips to help your daughter as she meets new people:

First impressions are incredibly powerful, especially when meeting new people. Encourage your daughter to be mindful of her body language, as it...

 In our ongoing discussions within The Brave Girl Tribe, our vibrant community for girls in 5th to 8th grade, a popular topic has emerged—building confidence in uncomfortable situations.

Our members shared stories about times they felt out of place or nervous, sparking a meaningful conversation and a desire to learn to be more confident when uncomfortable.

We all feel awkward or intimidated, especially in unfamiliar situations or around people we don’t know well. Our worry tries to protect us, making us crave comfort and predictability. When life becomes uncertain, this worry can make us uncomfortable and shake our confidence.

As parents and educators supporting girls, it's crucial to understand the challenges they face. Research on tween and teen girls has revealed several key insights about building confidence.

Here are the realities for our girls:

Studies show that girls' confidence levels drop significantly, with a 30% decrease between ages 8 and 14.
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